True Bosses bring this philosophy into their lives and you should too. Be kind, respectful and deferential when it is required. But when push comes to shove and things need to go down, unleash that war machine.
You should do this not out of pride or vengeance, but more to show people that you are not a person to be trifled with, and public examples will be made out of those who do.
I'm not specifically referring to physical violence, which should be avoided at all reasonable costs, but more like stations at work or with social groups.
If some person at the office has a major screw-up and tries to pin it on you (and it's not your fault), then unleash hell. Call the person out publicly, via e-mail specifically documenting the depths of their failures, providing evidence and specific examples, so that no one doubts who the victor is.
If someone is messing with you on a regular basis, record it on your phone, so when you go to an authority figure, you have documentation.
I'm old school. I don't like to publicly check or humiliate people. But someone in my circle at a place of employment screwed up, cost us all a lot of money, and I had to publicly reprimand them. I provided specific documentation that showed from where (and who) the error came from, made a public requirement that the person not do it again, and that was the end of it.
The offender wasn't happy being called out publicly, but they knew I was fair, they got the message and learned their lesson. In fact, I think they respected me for it. I would do it again if the situation demanded. You need to defend yourself and your family.
Speak softly and carry that stick. And when it comes time to swing, your better swing for the fences.