Go Exploring

A Boss is the master of his surroundings. He knows the best hole in the wall Chinese place, and also a cool spring he can take a lady friend if they’re interested in the outdoors.

The best way to find these places is to go exploring.

First, take your smartphone or a map in case you get lost. Then walk out your door and start going in a direction you’ve never gone before. And there you have it—you’re exploring!

Not only do you get a chance to check out more of your neighborhood (when most of the time you’re just going to and from school/work or the motorway), you can see how people live who don’t have cars. It’s a humbling experience, as these people are mostly invisible as you’re driving past.

When you find cool stuff, keep a journal online (or a blog!) of what you find.

Now if you’re really adventurous, you might want to try urban exploration. Urban exploration is essentially trying to find things that are hidden in plain sight in cities across the world. Condemned buildings, closed subway stations, abandoned lofts, closed mental asylums. You can find some really interesting things in these types of places, and some of them are relatively easy to get to. However, this type of exploring can be both (a) illegal and (b) dangerous, so always bring a partner and please exercise caution.

I personally go exploring all the time. A girl and I walked around New York City yesterday in a direction and a place that we’ve never been before. We found a place that still does a dollar-a-slice pizza and found some really interesting restaurants to try.

So get up, go out, “Live The Boss Life” and go exploring!

Get A Smartphone

Legit Bosses have access to all the information they need 24/7/365. Info on the money, the women, the businesses and anything else a Boss needs. If you want all that any time you want, then you need to get a smartphone.

The term “smartphone” is kind of a pejorative—it implies that other phones are “dumb.” Older mobile phones are good if all you want to do is make calls and text. Those aren’t dumb things; they’re essential forms of communication! For a long time, that’s all I did on a phone.

But if you want to check e-mail, if you get lost and need a quick map, if you want to prove a friend wrong in an argument, or want to play a lower-level game while you don’t have you DS or PSP handy, a smart phone can handle all of that for you.

Some smart phones such as the iPhone or Android models also have augmented reality applications where you can point at a restaurant using your phone’s camera and get information about whether or not it’s good in real-time on your view screen—very handy when picking out a place to eat.

I personally use an HTC Incredible with Android. I believe that Verizon is the best mobile carrier, the phone is as good as most of the others out there and I just don’t want to associate myself with Apple products. Not to mention Android being an open-source platform, I’ve been able to customize my phone in ways that one can’t easily do on an iPhone.

Bosses have all the information in world at their fingertips at any time and that’s why they have smartphones. So wait until your plan is up, or save up some money, and get a smartphone as soon as you can.

How To Get Out of Traffic Tickets

In my previous post, I wrote how you should not speak with the police in any circumstances. I don’t believe this applies to getting pulled over for a traffic violation. If you do get pulled over, and you don’t want to pay an often ludicrous fine, you should take one of two courses:

1. If you have a “get out of jail free card” from a police officer:

As soon as the cop comes up to your window, have your card, license and proof of insurance with your internal and external car lights on if it’s at night. Immediately admit guilt, say that your brother/father/uncle/cousin is an officer at [this precinct] and if they cut you a break, you’ll stop doing whatever it is you did when you got pulled over. Example of what to say below:

“Hi officer. Look, I know I was driving too fast, my brother is a cop at the two-six in Lincolnville. If you cut me a break, I’ll drive much slower.”

I have first hand experience with this and it will work on real police.

2. If you don’t have a get out of jail free card.

As soon as the cop comes up to your window, have your card, license and proof of insurance with your internal and external car lights on if it’s at night. The cop will ask if you know what you were doing wrong, say “no,” otherwise you’re admitting fault. If he says that you were speeding/didn’t use a turn signal/made a right on red in a no-right-on-red zone, ran a red light, etc. say “I understand, any chance you can cut me a break,” before the cop goes back to his car. Ask and you may receive.

If you get a ticket, check it for clerical errors, as these may get out off. If there aren’t any, go to court, plead not guilty, and get a continuance to your trial. They might not tell the cop and he might not show up. Before the trial if the cop is there, ask the officer to waive the ticket, and he might do so. If you have to go to trial, arrive in a suit/tie, look presentable, plead “Not Guilty” and bring with you pictures, diagrams, questions to ask the cop that might help exonerate you. Was it light out? Was there anyone else in the car? Where exactly did you pull me over? If they used a radar gun, when was it calibrated, do they have the proper certification to use it? Go online for more questions like these.

True Bosses don’t roll over and die when faced with a challenge. Fighting a traffic ticket is a challenge. Fight that ticket and win!

Be Polite, But Don’t Talk to Police

I kind of stole this from one of my readers (and fellow bloggers) Alberto but I was so affected by this video I had to pass it along.

Do not, under any circumstances, speak with the police. This is not some ghetto-justice “snitches get stitches” theory. If you or anyone you know was a victim of a crime, not only do I expect you go to the police and tell them everything you know, you’re required to do so as a good citizen.

The “Don’t Talk to The Police” is more to do with protecting you from wrongful prosecution and keeping you out of prison. The reasons to do so are legion, and you would do well to watch this video in its entirety. It is 50 minutes long, but in effect a criminal defense lawyer tells a class of lawyers “never let your client talk to the police.” Then an actual police officer follows him and says “everything he just said is true.” An actual cop!

No True Boss wants to go to prison. So if a cop wants to talk to you in relation to a criminal investigation, politely decline to speak to him. If he says why, just say that you have nothing to say, say you have fifth amendment rights and say that you won’t speak without a lawyer present and that will likely be that.

Watch this video and don’t talk to cops.

Site News: Broken Computer

Hey everybody. This is not a life tip at all, just informing you that the laptop that I use to blog/follow/comment/etc. broke mid-post yesterday morning and I had to write my post on my phone from the train. That's why I was unable to include my usual cheesecake picture at the top of my post because for some reason the browser I use just didn't let me. I feel like I have to make an excuse because some many people have told me how much they love the pics.

I'm still checking out all your blogs, following and commenting when I can, but I don't have Firefox on my phone. If anyone has any recommendations on what laptop to get, I'm all ears.

Teach

Teach

Part of being a boss is taking young men and women teaching them the things that made you a success.

Whether it is at the office, with family or a mentoring program, teaching can be very rewarding to both teacher and pupil.

Novice learners can discover the in's and out's of success by studying under someone who has been there before and knows how to get there. And teachers, while in the act of teaching, often get questions that they don't know the answer to, which leads to enrichment and further knowledge.

When it comes to teaching, I'm always happy to help out my friends, family and co-workers to learn a subject that I'm familiar with. I've also started mentoring inner-city youth to show them that there is a bright future ahead of them if they work hard in school and stay out of trouble.

Being a boss means taking the things you have learned and passing them down to the next generation. Do it, and you'll go far.

Get a Paternity Test

This one goes out to all the gentlemen in the world. If you have a child, or are about to, you must demand a paternity test from the mother.

Read this article in the NY Times. It details a number of stories of men whose wives, girlfriends and lovers who had cheated on them with another man. When this woman gave birth, the wrong father (usually the husband) signed the birth certificate claiming they were the father, and they were wrong. Now, these men have to pay child support to a child that aren't even theirs. That is tantamount to slavery according to this Boss, and Bosses aren't slaves.

If your woman doesn't want a paternity test, then you really need to consider ending your relationship with this person. After all, why should she feel nervous if there's nothing to hide? In the words of former US President Ronald Reagan, trust, but verify.

I broached the topic with my significant other in the event that a child is conceived, and while the idea is unnerving, a paternity test is

The peace of mind is worth the drama. Demand a paternity test, or hit the bricks..

Go To A Baseball Game

With Major League Baseball spring training having just begun, I thought I would share this tip—go to a baseball game. Bosses know how to relax from the daily stresses of life, and no other sports relaxes you like baseball.

You readers might say that baseball is boring, AND I AGREE WITH YOU! It's supposed to be boring. Baseball was invented as a way for farmers to pass the time when they weren't out in the fields, and doing all the kinds of work done before most farming machines were invented. Anything is more interesting than that type of farming, and that includes baseball.

The reason why you go is because the weather is nice, the food is pretty good, the crowd is pretty laid back, there are always cheap seats available and can you pop a few beers (or whatever else you sneak into the stadium) and chill. You can get a little color from the sun and interact with other fans. If you want to be really cheap (which I am known to be on occasion) shove a few “road sodas” into your belt, bring some food in with you in a bag and enjoy it.

Chances are, your team has no chance of making the playoffs, so you don't have to care who wins or loses. In fact, the worse your team is, the more fun you can have going, because the seats are less expensive. For the price of a third-tier ticket in Yankee Stadium, you can get right behind the plate in Houston.

And if you bring a love interest, you can spend some quality time with one another and really find out if you have chemistry. If you can sit through three hours of sporadic action and come out liking the person, you might have found a match.

Bosses might not necessarily like baseball, but they see the value of going to a game. You should too.

Speak Softly, But Carry A Big Stick

One of the early tenants of Theodore Roosevelt's presidency was to "speak softly and carry a big stick." What it meant was that the United States was a good friend and ally, but if one were to cross the country, the country will unleash the full force and power of its war machine.

True Bosses bring this philosophy into their lives and you should too. Be kind, respectful and deferential when it is required. But when push comes to shove and things need to go down, unleash that war machine.

You should do this not out of pride or vengeance, but more to show people that you are not a person to be trifled with, and public examples will be made out of those who do.

I'm not specifically referring to physical violence, which should be avoided at all reasonable costs, but more like stations at work or with social groups.

If some person at the office has a major screw-up and tries to pin it on you (and it's not your fault), then unleash hell. Call the person out publicly, via e-mail specifically documenting the depths of their failures, providing evidence and specific examples, so that no one doubts who the victor is.

If someone is messing with you on a regular basis, record it on your phone, so when you go to an authority figure, you have documentation.

I'm old school. I don't like to publicly check or humiliate people. But someone in my circle at a place of employment screwed up, cost us all a lot of money, and I had to publicly reprimand them. I provided specific documentation that showed from where (and who) the error came from, made a public requirement that the person not do it again, and that was the end of it.

The offender wasn't happy being called out publicly, but they knew I was fair, they got the message and learned their lesson. In fact, I think they respected me for it. I would do it again if the situation demanded. You need to defend yourself and your family.

Speak softly and carry that stick. And when it comes time to swing, your better swing for the fences.

Fifty Followers! So Awesome!

This isn't really much of a post, just a note thanking all my wonderful followers for reading my blog and showing the love. Fifty followers is a very nice accomplishment so far. I deeply appreciate all of you and I do my best to reciprocate.

Stay turned for more information on how to live a happier, better life. Much love!

One more thing: If anyone wants some advice/help on a specific question, feel free to shoot me an e-mail and I'll turn it into a post. Just give me your name, location, name of your blog (if you have one) and what your question is. I'll post a link to your blog and my best take on your situation. My address is "name of my blog before the-dot-blogspot" at "google's mail service" .com. How's that for beating the spambots!

Talk to you guys later.

Lifestyle: Walk In A Library

This tip might not work for everyone but it works for me.

When you have some free time and you're burned out from electronics, consider going to your local library and walking around.

In a typical public library, it costs no money to enter and just hang out, because the cost is already covered by tax dollars. Once inside, you'll see scores of books about subjects that might interest you.

My favorites are the autobiographies--stories of great men and women who write on how they earned their success. What can be better than leaning their secrets and being inspired by their stories? I love gaming as much as the next guy, but learning will likely be longer lasting (and much more practical) than your level 80 WoW toon. All Minecraft structures eventually fall.

So next time you're feeling a little burned out by electronic overload, pop on in to your local library and get your knowledge on. After all, you can't "Live The Boss Life" without knowing all the angles.

Lifestyle: Add Variety to Your Wardrobe

Bosses can be comfortable in multiple social environments, and that means wearing clothes that can fit any situation. But how can you add variety if all you wear are hoodies and jeans?

Three easy steps:

1. Buy versatile clothes

Some fashions can work when you're at school, your job, or even at a hip party. Polo shirts, collared button downs, khakis and nice jeans can be worn anywhere, at any time and for any occasion. A casual jacket or has the added value of being both an accessory and keeping you warm, and usually looks better than a sweatshirt.

2. Never throw out clothes

Fashion is cyclical and you never know when something will slip back into style. In addition, if you only buy versatile, timeless threads, they'll never be out of style for long. Five years ago if a girl wore leggings, people thought she was weird, now they're everywhere!

3. Ask loved ones for clothes

No one has your best interests at heart like your friends and family. Ask them for your next birthday (or religious holiday) to get you something that they think you'll look good in, and something that's typically not your style.

I can't tell you how many times I've opened a present, hated the look of it, and only once did I put it on I realize how good it looked. If you're too preppy, new clothes might edge your look. If you're thuggish, a collared shirt might will soften it.

That's not to say that you're supposed to go to a DnB party dressed like a j.crew model, or if you're going to your girlfriend's house, you like you came from a thrash metal concert. But if your look is versatile, you look like you can fit in at all those places.

Live the Boss life, and add variety to your wardrobe. You can't run things if you don't look the part.

Lifestyle: Reminder: Dropbox is Freaking Amazing

Lifestyle: Reminder: Dropbox is Freaking Amazing

True Bosses have their lives organized, and no other service organizes your life on computers more than Dropbox.

Let me explain—Dropbox is like special server that you can put on your phone, laptop, and computer that easily and simultaneously keeps all your files in one place.

Let's say that you have a blog post that you're working on your home computer. If you wanted to work on it more from the office or from your mobile phone, you would either have to e-mail it to yourself, or carry it with you on a flash drive.

With Dropbox, you don't have to do any of that. Just open up a Dropbox, put the files in, and presto! Anywhere else in the world where you open a Dropbox you have the files you need. Or you can just go to the Dropbox website, and check it out from there.

There's a pretty high limit to the space on the Dropbox as well, so it's conceivable that you can put your entire music, video and picture library on it and have it available to access from any computer anywhere in the world.

Isn't that awesome? Stop what you're doing right now and get Dropbox. You'll be thrilled you did, and you'll be one step closer to Live The Boss Life.

Lifestyle: Live Large and Shop Secondhand Stores

Lifestyle: Live Large and Shop Secondhand Stores

Want to look sharp but don't have a lot of money to spend? “Live The Boss Life” and try buying clothes at secondhand stores.

You'll find true variety in secondhand stores—ranging from old professional wrestling t-shirts or higher-end designer fashion that's more work appropriate. And with the rise of the vintage clothing trend, your wardrobe will be hip as well, and will cost less than at your average retail center.

Now, admittedly, secondhand stores are pretty hit-or-miss. Some days, you might find some of the coolest stuff, but won't have the money to buy it all. Other times you won't find anything for a month.

But depending on the area where you shop, you might find some pretty nice clothes (and furniture), especially if you're near a large urban area like New York, San Francisco, Austin or Atlanta.

I go shopping at secondhand stores all the time. Some of my best finds include a sweet pair of Armani suit pants for $30 (a $200 value) and a Brooks Brothers button-down shirt for $10 (a $60 to $90 value). I've also bought khaki pants and jeans, staples that never go out of style and are always in stock.

I'm partial to the Housing Works chain of stores, where you can get great deals (like the ones I just mentioned) on nice looking clothes, and support a great cause as well. And once you're done with the clothes, and if they're still wearable, complete the virtuous circle and donate them to a secondhand store.

“Live The Boss Life” and shop at secondhand stores. You'll look great, save money and be very happy with your purchases.

Say Yes to the Sex

“Live The Boss Life” – Say Yes to the Sex

There are times in our lives, when a fetching member of the desired sex will show signs, both overt and covert, that they want to “get down,” and they want to get down tonight. You're unencumbered by a significant other, sexually active, but after reading these signs, you may say “no thanks” or “not tonight.” Maybe you're looking to hook up with someone else, or maybe you think the two of you have no chemistry.

What are you, out of your mind?!!

If you really want to “Live The Boss Life” always say, “Yes” to the sex.

If you're waiting for someone else, don't, as “a bird in the hand is always worth two in the bush.” And for all for all you know, that person will be the most fun partner you had or will ever have. That person might teach you things you hadn't known before. Or maybe that person is really, really into you, and you would be making that person's year if you throw them a little bone.

After a few rounds, you may find that you do have chemistry and you'll want to see them again. Or if not, you will definitely have a great memory and an interesting story.

There have been many times in my life when I've said no to sex. I thought that the person was too old, too young, below my standards of attractiveness, or was an ex of a friend or someone I knew. What I should have done was jump on that, literally! I now rue the days when I turned down these people, and probably missed out on a very fun time.

Naturally, there are limits to this rule, such as if the person is known to have STD's, a spouse versed in Ultimate Fighting, is a workplace sexual harasser, or not a member of the desired sex. Or maybe if you are saving yourself for someone more special, or on the opposite end, you don't want to get a reputation as an “easy” person, then it's perfectly reasonable to say no.

But if you're none of those things, and you're offered, make sure you have the right protection and say “Yes” to the Sex. You'll probably be glad you did, and you'll be “Living the Boss Life.”

Live the Boss Life -- Create Visions, Not Dreams Part 3

Live the Boss Life -- Create Visions, Not Dreams Part 3

Read Part 1 and Part 2.

Now that we have a goal and we’ve created a path, step three is planning the steps you’ll take own that path.

Let’s say that your goal is to become a doctor. Your path is to first get good grades throughout high school and an undergrad, then work for a few years in something related to medicine, like in the medical research field. Then apply to medical l school, pass the boards, go through three to four years of residency and by then you can practice medicine wherever and whenever you want.

This is a complex path that will take over a decade to accomplish! Many items along this path are difficult to achieve in and of themselves. After all, we all want (or wanted) to get good grades in school, but that also takes hard work. In order to walk this path, we need to map the steps.

3. Map your steps

Let’s start with good grades throughout high school. The number of classes you have to take each year vary, but in each of those classes, let’ say that your goal is to get at least a 90 average per semester in each of your classes. In order to get this 90 average, you will need to study all of your subjects two hours per day, six days a week, for each semester you are in class.

This may require that instead of running for class president or joining the soccer team, you have to study. Or instead of screwing around on the Internet for two hours a night, you have to limit yourself to half and hour.

4. Stay disciplined

All of this takes a tremendous amount of discipline to accomplish. Somedays, people don’t feel like studying, or there are these really awesome cat videos you want to watch on YouTube.  But almost no one becomes a doctor accidently. It takes years of hard work and practice to accomplish a goal, and a lot of discipline to stick to your goals and remember what you’re working for. That’s why doctors make the big dollars and are respected in the community. That’s why they live the “Live The Boss Life.”

In my own life I’ve tried to follow this plan. For example, last year I wasn’t happy with the direction of my career. My bosses didn’t give me the respect I deserved, the pay wasn’t great, the work wasn’t fulfilling and I wanted a change. So I started a plan to get a job in a similar field that was a little more tech-orientated. The path was to research the company I wanted to work for, find if they were hiring, call the hiring manager or HR person and make my “elevator pitch” to be hired, nail every interview I went on and be humble throughout the salary negotiations.
It worked. I am much happier now than I was before and my colleagues tell me they love the job I’m doing.

You too can “Live the Boss Life” and do nearly anything you ever wanted. Just be sure to create visions, not dreams, and execute your vision until it becomes a reality.

Live The Boss Life -- Create Visions, Not Dreams Part 2

Live The Boss Life -- Create Visions, Not Dreams Part 2

This is part two of a post titled "Create Visions, Not Dreams." Read it here to get started.

OK, caught up? Good. It’s essential to create vision and not dreams when planning to “Live the Boss Life.” It's much easier to create dreams than it is visions, because dreams ignore all the hard work it took to be a success.

So how do you create a vision?

1. Get a goal in mind.

Goals are probably the most important part of your vision, because you need to have an end to achieve through your means. Fortunately it’s also the easiest part. You want to work in government, lose 20 pounds or run a marathon, here’s where you lock in that goal.

2. Research your path

A lot of people get achieve part one of their vision and ignore step two, which is supremely important. You have to research your path that will allow you to arrive at your goal. Research is important because it tells you (a) if there actually is a path to your goal and (b) how other people have reached this goal.

Let’s say that you want to play centerfield for the New York Yankees. That is step one of your vision. However you are 45 years old. You are unauthentic. You are female. Chances are quite good, barring a miracle of God and science; you will not be taking that field on opening day.

But if you’re that same person, and you want to be the manager of your unit at your company, there is a path to get there. Maybe your manager finished four years of college and you only finished two. Maybe the manager has successfully reached her sales goal eight quarters in a row before her promotion. Maybe the manager personally lobbied her manager to give her a chance, and when she got that chance, she brought a fresh perspective that made everyone around her better.

Finishing the degree, achieving your sales numbers, lobbying the manager, and doing your best at the one shot you have. That’s the path.

Remember, people who forget this step do so at their own peril. They are possibly risking a world of disappointment and unhappiness.

A young man wants to be an investment banker. However, he never studied the required courses in college. He did not achieve the GPA in college most firms demand. He never got an internship that opened any doors for him. And anytime he did get an interview, he did not speak the same language as the interviewer because he had no real exposure to that world. In hindsight, we can see why he failed to reach his goal. Maybe there was no path for this young man, or maybe his plan wrong from the start.

So to “Live the Boss Life” first get a goal, then plan a path to achieve it.   

Next time, we’ll go over more of the “Create Visions, Not Dreams” theory. Stay tuned!

Live The Boss Life – Create Visions, Not Dreams

Live The Boss Life – Create Visions, Not Dreams

When you’re nodding off in class, while at home, or anywhere else, you imagine that you’re a famous rock star. You play awesome music, your fans are legion, women love you, men want to be like you, kids style their hair the same way that you do, and money is never, ever an object.

For you, living that life is the life you always dreamed of, your own personal “Boss Life.” But what are you doing to get there? What are you doing to achieve all that glory?

Imagining what life would be like once you achieve your goals is a dream. Creating a plan to get there is a vision.

Sticking with the music analogy, The Beatles didn’t collectively roll out of bed in the morning and become rock gods. They learned to play their instruments, played long live sets for little money, experimented with different types of music, and killed it every time they went on. Thousands upon thousands of hours of practice went into their records, let alone what they went through to get discovered.

If you have any goal, whether it’s to work in investment banking, play in the NFL, provide a little extra money for your family or become “The Boss” at your own company, there’s a path to get there. But that path won’t be found by imaging the end before you’ve discovered the means.

Create visions, not dreams. Stay tuned for tips on how to create those visions.

Live The Boss Life – An Introduction

Live The Boss Life is a blog dedicated to help you, the reader, live the type of life that you deserve to live. Confident, smart, strong—the kind of person who runs things, lives a great lifestyle, is a jack of all trades, people listen to and in the end is very, very happy. In this blog you’ll get lifestyle tips, fashion tips, and other general ideas and philosophies that will help you start living the boss life; the kind of life where you run the show.

Living The Boss Life isn’t limited to business or finance, you can be in any industry, be of any gender or sexuality, so long as you want to improve your life, even by a little bit, this blog will likely help you along the way.

So e-mail, comment, post (and ideally click on an ad here or there!) and I’ll show you how to live the life of the boss.